The Journey Home
by ToDieYoung
Summary: A look into the lives of the Pevensie children in the weeks before Aslan calls them home. LB spoilers. Will have multiple chapters. R&R.
1. Chapter 1

The Journey Home

Seventeen year-old Lucy looked out the window of her London bedroom. It was about nine o'clock in the evening, and though the sun had already tucked itself neatly under the horizon line, the sky remained a cool, baby blue. It was that unnamed, in between space that occurs after the sun sets, but before the sky goes completely black.

She had been thinking about Narnia again. Ever since that unknown man had appeared at Professor Kirke's dining table not very long ago, she knew something was happening there, something very terrible. She was very aware that Aslan always knew what He was doing, but not sending her back when Narnia seemed to need her most… unless He knew she would be of no use there… a thought which had lowered her self confidence tremendously over the past couple of days. Either way, she only wanted to help her people, and she found not being able to to be quite torturous.

Lucy turned from the window. Her room had recently become a very quiet, peaceful place. Susan had not so long ago moved in with a boyfriend, much to the rest of the family's disapproval. Lucy didn't quite see what the big deal was; Susan was an adult now, why should it matter whether she was married to this boy? It wasn't as if she were hurting anyone. Still, her parents and Peter never hesitated to tell Susan that her behavior was "un-ladylike", that common-law relationships were not respectable.

Lucy had observed that whenever these conversations came up, Edmund was the only one, save her, who remained quiet. It took her quite a bit of courage to ask him what he thought, and when she finally did, he exhaled deeply and simply said that they, "just didn't want Su to be taken advantage of".

Lucy understood, but thought to herself, "What if Susan is the one taking advantage?"

After Susan had left, Lucy had gained her own bedroom, which in a way was both nice, and a bit lonely. The silence of the dark at night scared her a little, but also kind of reminded her of her room in Narnia. If she closed her eyes, she could imagine that she was there, which sometimes made her all the more lonely.

She talked to Aslan in her head sometimes, and sometimes she swore she could hear Him talking back. But it wasn't the same as before, it didn't feel as real. It felt as though she might just be talking to herself in the back of her head, fooling herself into thinking she was getting a response. She knew Aslan existed and was there, but sometimes could not help but wonder if He had been the one to forget _her_.

Lucy was particularly lonely tonight. She missed her sister, and had found herself staring out the window after a particularly short telephone conversation with her. It wasn't the same as their late night talks they had had with each other from their beds. The conversation had been small talk, and while Susan was a pro at talking small, Lucy had always favoured talking big.

Susan had changed. She had always been good at small talk and polite conversation, but she also used to be able to spend hours having deep conversations with Lucy. Now, not so much was passed between the two of them.

The big empty bedroom was starting to make Lucy feel almost mournful toward Susan, so she quickly left and knocked on her brother's door across the hall.

"C'min" she heard Edmund's sleepy mumble, his throat cracking from lack of use.

Ed was at his desk, pouring over his university books. His dark hair was a mess. He had dark circles under his eyes, making his brown irises appear almost black. His smile at Lucy's appearance, however, brightened his whole face. "Thank God," he said, "I thought you were Pete."

Peter had changed too. He was much more stern now. He worked long hours at strange times, which sometimes made him quite unpleasant. That, mixed with his genuine overprotectiveness of his siblings sometimes made him unbearable.

"Is he at work?"

The sky had quickly faded to black, and Lucy could only see Edmund's features from the dim glow of his desk lamp as he nodded.

"Yeah, he works late tonight. I've just lost track of the time, been studying all night".

Lucy nodded in response, secretly glad Peter was absent. She loved him to bits, but right now she needed to be sad and to mope, and Peter had become a lot less patient with her after he started working. Lucy understood, but she also knew that Edmund worked almost as hard on his schoolwork as Peter did at his job, and as a result got a lot less sleep than Peter. Even so, her Just brother never faltered in being ever gentle with her.

Lucy noticed that Peter had made his bed, whereas Edmund had not, so she climbed into Ed's and wrapped herself in the duvet. Edmund had turned back to his schoolwork, and Lucy felt content just to lie there and listen to him turn pages and to know that he was there and that he cared about her and that he had not forgotten. In fact, she was calmed down and almost asleep when she heard him get up, sit at the edge of the bed, and ask her what was wrong.

"It's nothing," she replied, "I just didn't want to be alone".

She could almost hear her brother's frown, even though her head was under his blanket.

"Pray tell, fair sister, why hast thou seeketh out my company?"

Edmund was rubbing circles on the back of the covered lump that was Lucy. He knew speaking in Narnian tounges always soothed her. She never expected them, and perhaps forgot they existed until she would get upset and he would speak softly to her in that wonderful poetic form of English. It would trigger a memory within her, and she would reply without missing a beat.

"I hope not to offend thee, my dear Edmund, as I hold you in the highest regard, but I feel as though I do not have another soul upon which to turn! Dearest Susan has left us, and even so does not believe the stories we recall of our kingdom. Peter is often much too tired to be as patient in tending to me as thou. And my bedroom, Edmund! She makes me sad". Lucy finished and heaved a loud sigh, which made Edmund smile.

"You do not offend me in the slightest, my queen" he assured her. He pulled the duvet off of her head and began to stroke her hair.

They sat like that for a while, and Lucy was just happy to have someone who understood what she felt in regards to her worries about Narnia and her longing for Susan to return. It wasn't long before they heard a knock on the door, and before Edmund could answer, Peter made his way in.

"Lu? What's wrong?" he asked upon seeing her. Lucy knew his concern was genuine, but could tell by his voice that he thought of her being upset as just something more he had to deal with before bed. Before Lucy could answer him, however, Edmund spoke.

"Our sister wanted some company, is all. I'd also like to point out that my bed was neatly made today, however I gallantly sacrificed its aesthetics for my sister's comfort".

He winked at Lucy and she giggled. Peter rolled his eyes, and actually smirked for a second, but it had gone as quickly as it had come. He then asked Lucy to leave, as he needed to get right to sleep in order to get to work early the next morning.

She went back to her bedroom alone.

At one o'clock that morning, Edmund decided he was finally finished studying for the night. Peter was snoring in the bed behind him. As quietly as he could, he clicked off his desk lamp and made his way to Lucy's bedroom.

He knocked –loud enough for her to hear if she was awake, but soft enough as to not disturb her sleep. There was no answer, so he crept in, ever so quietly.

She was asleep, no doubt about that. He could hear her slow quiet breathing, but she was also muttering. Something about Su, then about Narnia, then about war strategies…

She'd always wanted to help. He could remember her wanting to fight in battles oh so long ago. He, unlike Peter and Susan, didn't care that she was a girl, so long that she could hold her own.

But she couldn't. Swords and armor, unfortunately, were made for men. They were too heavy for her, especially –paradoxically- as she got bigger. The armor and the sword grew with her, but she lacked the upper body strength that came to him naturally; that miniscule amount that he had used as a foundation to build onto.

He'd felt bad for her, being unable to help. She was a queen just as much as he was a king, these were her people too. She wanted to protect them just as much as he did. She wanted to protect him just as much as he wanted to protect her.

So he helped her. He got her involved in creating strategies for battle. She helped to heal the injured. She helped to train knights and warriors. Lu was the brains of the operation, he and Peter just followed her careful planning. She did as much, even more, for Narnia than either of them.

Now, she couldn't help, and he could tell it bothered her. She had lost her sister, and her brother was teetering on the edge. He had his schoolwork to distract him, but she had nothing.

He sat on the edge of her bed and stroked her hair again.

"Sleep softly, my Valiant sister," He whispered, careful not to wake her, "Do not worry, for your brothers are safe at home, far from battle. Your sister is safe as well, and is off courting a gallant ("God," he thought, "I hope so") gentleman. You are safe too, Lucy love, for your brothers, both knights of Narnia, are here to defend you from any and all dangers of this world and the next. Please, I bequeath you, dream sweeter dreams".

She did not stop mumbling, but she definitely slowed. He kissed her temple, sighed, and climbed into Susan's empty bed. It smelled of her, and he was angry. Angry at Su for forgetting, and then for running away. Angry at that bloke for not marrying his sister. He didn't understand it. He'd be lucky to find another girl half as good as Susan, unless he found Lucy, in which case, Edmund thought, he'd be dead… Susan was clearly his best option.

Edmund inhaled Susan's duvet again, and hoped she was okay. He thought momentarily about driving to their apartment, checking in to make sure everything was okay, that he was treating her right. But then, he thought, he'd have to leave Lucy. Besides, Peter would have done it already, multiple times. She'd be home right now, and her boyfriend would have a bloody lip if Pete's standards weren't met, he thought. There was no use worrying.

He heard Lucy sniff and pull her blankets tighter around herself. She had stopped mumbling completely, as though eased by his presence alone. Closing his eyes, he let sleep wash over him. He dreamed he was fighting in battle alongside Eustace and Peter, driven, as always, by the thought of Lucy and Susan, waiting at the Cair for him to return.


	2. Chapter 2

Since their more than incredible stay at his house more than three years ago, Eustace Clarence Scrubb could not get enough of his cousins. Eustace was, and always had been, a man of science and facts; things easily proved. To him, his cousins were evidence that something extraordinary had in fact happened to him; something otherwise unexplainable. He feared that if he spent too much time without their company, he would begin to forget… he would begin to reason.

And so as soon as Eustace had turned sixteen a couple of months ago, he got his drivers certificate and began taking his father's car out on Sunday mornings to the Pevensie house. He normally brought Jill along too, but today was the first Sunday since Susan had left, so he decided it was best kept a family affair.

He knocked on the door, and Lucy answered. Her face brightened as soon as she saw him, and she leaped into his arms as though she hadn't seen him in years, when in reality it had just been a few days. He let go and kissed her hand, with a very polite, "My queen", and a wink.

Ed and Peter joined them at the door, shaking Eustace's hand with solemn faces. It took a lot more to distract them from Susan's departure. Lucy was the most deeply hurt by it, but by nature found happiness in the smallest things; she was easy to comfort. Still, Eustace was able to see the hurt in her eyes as clearly as he could see it in her brothers'.

"Come in, Eustace" Peter offered, stepping aside to let him in the front door. Peter led the way to the kitchen; Edmund offered Lucy his arm, and they followed with Eustace bringing up the rear.

They sat around the small kitchen table. There was silence for a moment; nobody knew what to say. It was obvious to the Pevensies why their cousin had come without Jill. It was Lucy who finally spoke.

"We all miss her" her voice was almost a whisper, "It's not even that she left, really. She's grown, it's her life. What bothers me the most is that she called us liars. She doesn't believe anymore. It's like the first time, when none of you believed me. But this is worse. She was there. She was a queen, these were her people. How can she just not believe anymore?"

Peter was lightly stroking Lucy's back. It had been hard on everyone, but mostly Lucy. Susan had not only been her sister, but best friend as well. Eustace found himself staring at Peter's hand, moving up and down, before he formed his thoughts into words.

"I think", he said slowly, carefully, "That Susan might be too smart for her own good. I mean, I'm the same way: I don't put value on anything that can't be proved. It's why I hang around you lot so much, it keeps me believing… helps me remember. I'm sure she'll find her way back. I mean, I did. Remember how I started out? I didn't believe any of it until halfway though my first stay in Narnia."

"But Eustace," Edmund spoke, softly, calmly, as he always did, "you were brought into Narnia, and that's what changed you. Susan's not going back, it can't be proven to her again."

"But it's healthy, I think, to question. Even to question things you know are true, to ask why or how, you know? Aslan loves Su, Ed. I believe He'll do all He can to help bring her back, it's up to her to accept the help."

The three siblings nodded, comforted by their cousin's words, wondering if their sister would accept help when offered.

Eustace drove them to church. He walked in beside Peter, Lucy still clutching Edmund's arm behind them. This visit to his cousin's house felt like a funeral for Susan. Everyone was glum, even Lucy had dead eyes. Eustace spent the service wondering if God really was as terrible as the pastor made him out to be.

He found himself sometime later sitting cross-legged in the Pevensie's backyard. The sun had long since gone down and stars were lighting up the sky. Lucy's head was in his lap, and he had a half-empty beer in his hand. Edmund and Peter were there as well, out on the lawn, watching the stars and talking.

"Is she asleep?" Edmund asked Eustace, gesturing to Lucy. Eustace looked down, Lucy's eyes were closed. He nudged her softly, and asked, "Lu?"

She gave a sleepy "Hmm.." before furrowing her brow and turning from her back to her side. She'd had a glass of wine or two, which was well known to make her tired.

"I believe so," Eustace answered. Ed nodded and took the last swig from his bottle.

"Would you like to stay the night, Eustace?" Peter asked him, "I doubt Edmund would mind if you took his bed. He sleeps in Susan's now."

Eustace accepted Peter's offer before turning to Edmund and raising his eyebrows.

"Lucy's worst at night," he said, "she's been talking in her sleep. She's used to sharing a room with Susan. My being there seems to help; she likely thinks I'm Su in her sleep. She doesn't know I've been doing it though. I leave for school early in the morning, before she wakes."

Eustace nodded, and Edmund added, "I just want her to get some rest, she's been very stressed about this whole issue in Narnia, and then Susan's leaving… I have to do what I can."

"What are we going to do about Narnia, I mean, have you tracked down the rings yet?"

"Not yet," Peter spoke quietly, as not to wake Lucy, "It's proven very difficult. It seems the houses that The Professor and Lady Polly lived in have been torn down to build a newer subdivision… You know, for returning soldiers to start families. We don't even know that there hasn't been a house built over them by now."

Eustace nodded, and stifled a yawn. He rubbed his hand up and down Lucy's arm, as if to warm her up. They decided it was time to head to bed. Edmund had class in the morning, Peter had work, and Eustace had to make the long drive home. Peter collected the empty beer bottles, and Edmund crawled over to where Eustace and Lucy were settled.

"Lucy, love," he shook her slightly. Her eyes popped open, and Eustace felt her stiffen, then immediately relaxed when she realized who she was with. Edmund helped her up, and put his arm around her waist to steady her as he walked her in the back door and up the stairs. She was small, and it didn't take much wine for her to become a little more than tipsy. The fact that she had just woken up didn't help her balance much either.

Eustace watched them leave. He realized that Narnia wasn't the only thing in shambles, his family was too. He sighed as he made his way to the boy's bedroom upstairs, dressed in a borrowed pair of pajamas, and settled into Edmund's bed. The alcohol made falling asleep effortless, but thoughts of the Pevensies moved through his dreams, making his sleep far less than peaceful.


End file.
